Get over it!

I've been learning an important lesson that I just can't shake for the life of me. It's harsh. But I believe it's the key. 

We need to get over ourselves: 

1.) We need to get over sin & weakness. We're all screw ups. We all act idiotic at times. But then when an opportunity comes to become incredibly powerful and great for the kingdom, we spiritually cross our arms and stomp our foot in refusal. We claim we're too screwed up or weak to handle something so big. But it's not an acceptable excuse. Shall we discuss the most powerful people in Scripture & the choices they made at times? David murdering and commiting adultery? Aaron crafting a golden calf for the Israelites to worship? Rahab making her living as a prostitute? Tamar deceiving her Father-in-law into impreganting her? Peter's lack of belief that caused Him to sink? Jonah's stubborn selfishness? I could go on for days.......these people are prime examples of human beings who chose to embrace being extraordinary despite their past. Think about it. 

2.) We need to get over our dignity. Some of the most amazing and most powerful people I've met have learned this lesson well. If we just stopped caring what others think of us, we'll move and function in the Spirit in a way that leaves others walking away from us encountering healing, freedom, refreshment, Jesus. Unfortunately, too many times we won't be "weird" because we care about other's opinions of what we're doing. As if they're so much more put together than we are. 

3.) We need to get over entitlements. 

There are so many things we are taught to feel entitled to. Independence. Home-owning. A job. Retirement. Healthcare. Choosing our future and making our own plans. Debt. Choosing when to have children and how MANY to have. But if you know Jesus, He is calling us to something so much bigger and wilder than the way that our society has raised us to think and view the world. And only when we get over all we think we HAVE to have do we truly begin to see what He's up to in a way that will become so much more exciting and fulfilling than we could've ever guessed. 

4.)We need to get over our DESIRES. 

There are a thousand things I want to do with my life. Live in the south. Spend time in the Bayou. Spend at least several years in Africa. Minister to young women. Write books. Compose. Act in theatre again. Work for Disney or Pixar. Be married to someone passionate about audaciously serving Jesus. On and on and on. But I'm beginning to see that by continually handing my desires over, that whole "miserable, life is overwhelming, how can I EVER work hard enough to get there, I'll never be qualified enough for anything, I will never be able to afford it" feeling that most Americans experience begins to fade. It's scary as heck to hand it all over at first. But then you realize that Jesus wants GOOD and FUN and HAPPINESS and JOY and SUCCESS and WHOLENESS for you. More than you want for yourself! And suddenly you want nothing more than His plan. Trust Him. Try Him. Test Him in this. You'll see. 

Weak

I'm seeing places ALL over scripture in which God uses and says He'll use the weak to teach and shame the strong. 

I'm just wondering. What would happen if we all stopped waiting until we felt stronger or more ready and just let God powerfully work through and IN our weakness? Because I'm starting to realize it may actually be a more positive thing than our culture has taught. And just maybe, if we got over it, we would rise up to change the world. 

*Until we cease surviving & begin vibrantly living*

Old-School.

It's hard to sum up in words everything God's been saying, teaching, and doing in my life. The list is quite extensive and not always one that can be adequately expressed. Have you ever been shifting into an awareness of something so big that something in you just could not for the life of your being talk about it, even while every ounce of you wanted to shout it from every rooftop? (It makes me think of Mary when she "pondered these things in her heart." The greek word for pondered there meant to quietly meditate.)

The point I want to make today is that I've come to believe perhaps if we aren't experiencing Jesus in this way, something is very wrong. I was raised with the idea that life can just be mundane and not all that crazy big. That our eternity in Heaven is when the party really starts. And it appears to me that much of our society lives in a state of dis-content birthed out of feeling hopelessly bored and un-excited about life. (And why do you think we have so much obesity, gambling, club life, and Hollywood? Because people are bored and looking for a distraction.) But I've really shifted into seeing with different eyes lately. I am willing to argue that part of our experience and Kingdom is taking place NOW. WE are the Kingdom of the Living King. And watching Him at work and working alongside Him should be an incredibly wild, adventurous, and breath-taking experience. Every day. All the time. One of the reasons I know I don't FEEL like it is sometimes is because I spend entirely too much time looking at other people's lives, keeping in touch with them through texts and tweets and Facebook. The problem with this is that we're made for community and contact. Social media creates a weird half-contact with another that just doesn't cut it. And in the process we've in-advertantely been comparing ourselves to everyone else and seeing whether we think our lives are as good.

I am tired of my life and conversation being held online. I want to be able to actually hold a letter from a friend when I'm sad or emotional. Recognize their handwriting. Get a leap of excitement in my stomach when i open the mailbox. I want pictures of my favorite people plastered on my walls and physically in that mesh zipper of the suitcase when I'm in airports and other states and countries rather than the photo album of my iphone. I want my relationships built around early morning cups of coffee, trips to Disneyland that don't involve "checking in" at every ride, thrift store shopping, working together on a theatre production, building houses and playing with kids in Mexico and Africa, road trips and ridiculously spontaneous adventures in which we get to watch Jesus constantly at work in front of us, through us, and in us.

Don't get me wrong. I love social media, but I worry about our generation and the way we LIVE in it. I want to rebel against it just a little more often. Get together with people and turn the phone off and talk and do Jesus together. Sometimes being a bit old-school is a good thing.

Africa update.

Today, things changed. As you may know I have been very excited about all that Agape has been doing in Kenya and I've been working towards a trip to check it all out.

Today I found out that there are some delightful new missionaries coming to work with Agape. Decisions are needing to be made about who will be where and doing what and when.....logistics. In the process of all that is happening, it looks like there just may not really be a need for me long-term at this time- something my heart has been wondering about and considering. They have welcomed me to still come for a short-term trip, and I have gladly taken them up on the offer. I know that no matter WHAT the future holds, I will glean wisdom and learn valuable lessons to take into the future.

I will be going to Kenya from June26-July13th. I trust The Lord has some incredible plans. Please be praying for the the trip as well as the future. My heart does indeed ache to serve long-term in Africa. Somehow. Somewhere. And soon. Thank you to all who've been such an incredible support.

alertness.

If in my head I quickly list some of the people I believe to be extraordinarily powerful and influential, I come to a disturbing discovery. Almost every person who's been called to a deeper and crazier life, a life of teaching and equipping others, has at least one loved one who suffers from some form of life-controlling addiction or battles some form mental instability and hardship. As I think of all my favorite pastors, missionaries, teachers, speakers, authors, musicians, and friends who are in the trenches of a foreign country working endlessly on behalf of the kingdom, I can list what almost all of those people's families deal with. On pretty intense levels. Now, maybe this is just coincidence and the truth is that a large majority of families today happen to be dealing with these issues. But to me it seems like there just might be someone roaming around, hungry, looking to devour. And I think this lion is pretty smart. So I think we need to be smarter. More aware. In tune. In prayer. This is a bloody and messy battle. He goes after those who have influence because they're a threat to him. We need to get more dirty and be in the trenches with each other way more often. Let's stop trying to make our lives look so grand on social media and just be raw and real and honest. Can you imagine what would happen if we talked about what was REALLY going on rather than our political agendas and opinions and pictures of our lunch or walk? Revolution would happen. Fresh, healing, unique, irresistible changes would take place. People wouldn't stay far away from worship on Sundays because they'd no longer fear hypocritical Christians and their judgement against them.(Did you know that's the #1 reason people don't attend a worship gathering?)And this world would not be able to deny the wave of Jesus that would be crashing down every bit of every one of the enemy's strongholds. A Tsunami of radical young people unlike anything seen before. Taking this world by storm. Who are some of your favorite influencers? Let's begin praying faithfully over their families. Over THEM. Standing boldly in truth without being deceived isn't easy.

This spot.

I recently was made aware of the fact that I'm actually EMBARRASSED by a lot of what my life looks like right now. A few former employees of one of my jobs asked me "you still working THERE?" with a sarcastic laugh. That made me really begin to become bitter against a whole array of things. And want even more than ever to get into a new stage. A new place. With new everything.

As I mulled this over for a while, I realized something important. I have been treating everything about this stage of my life as if it's just that. A stage. Nothing more. Something I have to put up with until things get better. Until Jesus lets me move on.

Then I was severely convicted yesterday. During a conversation with a co-worker who doesn't know The Lord, I was told that I am different in a way that makes her think about Jesus. And I realized in a flash that I am the only piece of Jesus she knows at this point. The responsibility and honor of such a situation is something that I most certainly don't want to just "put up with."

So I'm on a mission. A mission to become passionate about wherever I may be in this moment. Even if it's the last place I WANT to stay. Even if others think I'm a loser because of where I work and what I'm doing and how it's not "successful."
We can fall flat on our faces and passionately pray over any spot we find ourselves in. Like it or not. And that is precisely what The Lord WANTS from us. Perhaps I am stuck where I am just to learn this important lesson. A lesson we should all learn.

Because of.

I used to feel as if God doesn't answer or walk with people through things sometimes. If I didn't see someone experiencing deliverance in a tough situation, I sort of assumed He wasn't involved much. But thanks to Miss Beth I have been understanding a lot more lately about how God delivers. In any situation, there are 3 likely scenarios:
1. God may deliver us FROM it
2. God can deliver us IN it.
3. He can deliver us THROUGH it.

Say I get cancer. He can deliver me FROM it with healing me completely. IN it by healing me over time with chemo and radiation and doctors. Or THROUGH it by welcoming me with open arms into my new home and body. In all scenarios, He's delivered me. (BTW.....I believe there are countless times we're delivered FROM things and never even know what He's spared us from!)

Take Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. When Darias ordered them thrown into the fire, God could've easily stopped any part of the operation and delivered them completely from the flames altogether. But He didn't. Instead, they were thrown in and survived, coming out without so much as a scratch. I've often wondered if they were to come out unharmed why they had to go INto the fire.

Taking another look at it, I see that during their time in the fire, they had a protector join them and walk among the flames with them. Many historians believe that this could indeed be a pre-incarnate Jesus Himself. And when they emerged, scripture says not a hair on their heads was singed, but the bonds that had once been around their hands and feet were turned to ash. Yes. BECAUSE of the fire.

So, you see, when we and up having to walk IN the middle of a trial, it may be a whole lot better of a scenario than we imagined. We just may get to walk side by side with Jesus, have some bondage burned right off in the process, and remove from the fire unscathed.